If you think your job as a writer ends with The End, think again. I am a handful of words away from completing the first draft of a novelette that came from nowhere. I started looking at the requirements for submission to the ePublisher I targeted and broke into a cold sweat. Sure, I looked at them before when the thought of actually going through the process was still a pipe dream but now that I am this close, I wanted to be prepared. My first reaction was "I have to do what? What does that look like? Can I see some examples please?" Bear in mind it is not a complicated process that requires a degree in rocket science. I tend to exaggerate at times.
This might be a good time to mention that I am rather shy and intimidated by things I have not done before. I like to know what I am getting into before I leap. All right, I lied. I want someone to do it for me. Give me an example I can model mine after. Show me how it looks or works the first time around so I will get it right the next time. Hold my hand while I stroke the beast until I am comfortable enough to do it by myself.
What if it isn't formatted correctly? What if my paragraphs are too long? What if I do it so damned wrong that my brilliant novelette doesn't see the light of day because I suck at the preliminaries? So the other trait I harbor is perfectionist. I must be perfect, therefore my work must be perfect upon presentation. We all know that is a ridiculous notion right? Tell my inner editor that.
I feel completely stupid. I don't love my story because I think it sucks. I am certain everyone else will think it sucks as well. Am I afraid of the end? Am I one of those people who makes it to the finish line and cannot step across? If I am, them I am pursuing the wrong dream.
Bottom line - I am making this harder than it needs to be. Ask me again tomorrow and I might be floating on air at a mission accomplished. This might also be a good time to mention I am unpredictable.